Posts by Doubtfully Yours

46

Planning A Fade. Need Ideas

by Doubtfully Yours in

this double life is slowly eating away at me.

i'm planning to fade away and need all the ideas i can get.. it needs to be a fade because my parents, who i care deeply about are heavily into it and my poor hubby is wanting to obtain more privileges in the cong.

me, on the other hand, can't stand going to so many meetings and service and giving parts, etc.. very much appreciate your ideas and support.

Doubtfully Yours

To all,

Thanks for all your posts and your great ideas.

I'm definitely married to a firm JW who's pressured by many about us being young, not having children, and therefore needing to do more, more, more all the time. Also, he had a horrible childhood and young adulthood life before the Org love-bombed him, so this is all the better life he knows. He's even told me in the past that if he leaves the Org, he'll go back to the same to type of bad life he had in the past. What a messed up reasoning!!!

I've started for some time now some non-JW friendships and activities; that will ease the gradual loss of friends due to what might be labeled 'spiritual weakness' at first. As far as money and career, that's all pretty well taken care of and I feel I can do very well on my own, if I have to.

In my previous posts, I let know how we both enjoyed a somewhat double life, but then my husband has gotten very deep guilty feelings after some talks of encouragement he's had with elders and the like. So, in turn, now he wants to really get gong-ho about the Org and I'm just not in agreement.

My fading will not be easy at all, it will be long and it may even cost me my marriage, but continuing to come here will give me the strength I need. Thanks again all.

46

Planning A Fade. Need Ideas

by Doubtfully Yours in

this double life is slowly eating away at me.

i'm planning to fade away and need all the ideas i can get.. it needs to be a fade because my parents, who i care deeply about are heavily into it and my poor hubby is wanting to obtain more privileges in the cong.

me, on the other hand, can't stand going to so many meetings and service and giving parts, etc.. very much appreciate your ideas and support.

Doubtfully Yours

Thanks all for your help. Coming here to this board once again has been like an oasis for me today.

Just thought of a great idea!!! Right now I'll look into my Community College schedule to see if they have some classes that may interest me, one on Wednesday (meeting night) and one on Saturday morning (service meeting day).

Or, perhaps, I'll join the local gym and go during those days, or any days I want to get out of Org stuff. How's that?!!!

46

Planning A Fade. Need Ideas

by Doubtfully Yours in

this double life is slowly eating away at me.

i'm planning to fade away and need all the ideas i can get.. it needs to be a fade because my parents, who i care deeply about are heavily into it and my poor hubby is wanting to obtain more privileges in the cong.

me, on the other hand, can't stand going to so many meetings and service and giving parts, etc.. very much appreciate your ideas and support.

Doubtfully Yours

IWasDuped,

My husband and I were very high profile before, but then we moved and became somewhat involved in our jobs and acquiring certain material things that took up a lot of our time.

And, yes, lately my husband has been under a great deal of pressure that we should do much more in the Org because we don't have children and have more free time than most. He's under a great deal of pressure, and he craves higher privileges in the cong and you know for that the wife has to cooperate a lot and I'm just not willing to do it anymore.

I love him, but if having mental peace will cost me my marriage, so be it. I'm preparing to have a heart to heart talk with him which will decide what happens between us. I'm deathly afraid that I'll lose him because he really seems to care more for the Org and its people than for me.

Darn!!!!!!!!!!!

46

Planning A Fade. Need Ideas

by Doubtfully Yours in

this double life is slowly eating away at me.

i'm planning to fade away and need all the ideas i can get.. it needs to be a fade because my parents, who i care deeply about are heavily into it and my poor hubby is wanting to obtain more privileges in the cong.

me, on the other hand, can't stand going to so many meetings and service and giving parts, etc.. very much appreciate your ideas and support.

Doubtfully Yours

Stephanus,

You should see the terrible tantrums he throws whenever I back away from going to a meeting or to service! I mean, down right violent. The last one I feared for my safety; he got so loud and out of hand banging things that I thought he was going to hit me. And all just because I missed a Saturday service meeting and stayed at home instead cleaning my house thoroughly.

I'm fading, I tell you, this time there's no stopping me.

46

Planning A Fade. Need Ideas

by Doubtfully Yours in

this double life is slowly eating away at me.

i'm planning to fade away and need all the ideas i can get.. it needs to be a fade because my parents, who i care deeply about are heavily into it and my poor hubby is wanting to obtain more privileges in the cong.

me, on the other hand, can't stand going to so many meetings and service and giving parts, etc.. very much appreciate your ideas and support.

Doubtfully Yours

No children. Health concerns on my part.

This is one of the reasons my husband wants to pursue bigger things in the Org, but I just CAN'T live the lie anymore.

Previously in this board I bragged about having the time of my life living a double life, and for that I'm truly sorry; but, as you all know, it sooner or later comes to an end and for me it has. Mentally I can't handle it much longer. Lately, almost everything bothers me in this religious organization.

46

Planning A Fade. Need Ideas

by Doubtfully Yours in

this double life is slowly eating away at me.

i'm planning to fade away and need all the ideas i can get.. it needs to be a fade because my parents, who i care deeply about are heavily into it and my poor hubby is wanting to obtain more privileges in the cong.

me, on the other hand, can't stand going to so many meetings and service and giving parts, etc.. very much appreciate your ideas and support.

Doubtfully Yours

I've been missing as many meetings as possible lately, but every time is a very heated argument between my husband and I. And, of course, there's always my parents stopping by or calling to find out why I didn't attend.

These past couple of days I've gone as far as having the talk with my husband, hiring a lawyer, and leaving the State. I feel that serious about it this time.

Having to put on a front whenever I do attend the meetings, and service, is so so stressful.

46

Planning A Fade. Need Ideas

by Doubtfully Yours in

this double life is slowly eating away at me.

i'm planning to fade away and need all the ideas i can get.. it needs to be a fade because my parents, who i care deeply about are heavily into it and my poor hubby is wanting to obtain more privileges in the cong.

me, on the other hand, can't stand going to so many meetings and service and giving parts, etc.. very much appreciate your ideas and support.

Doubtfully Yours

Oh, Minimus, I wish it were only that easy!

Just the other day my husband in so many words told me that we got married by the Organization and if I told him I wanted nothing with the Organization then that would be pretty much the end of our marriage. Bear in mind that I love this man very much, and he's an excellent husband except for the fact that he's into this religion big time and wants bigger participation.

Of course, me being the wife, need to help him by increasing my visibility in all activities and I just CAN'T play that game anymore!!!

HELP!!!

46

Planning A Fade. Need Ideas

by Doubtfully Yours in

this double life is slowly eating away at me.

i'm planning to fade away and need all the ideas i can get.. it needs to be a fade because my parents, who i care deeply about are heavily into it and my poor hubby is wanting to obtain more privileges in the cong.

me, on the other hand, can't stand going to so many meetings and service and giving parts, etc.. very much appreciate your ideas and support.

Doubtfully Yours

This double life is slowly eating away at me. I'm planning to fade away and need all the ideas I can get.

It needs to be a fade because my parents, who I care deeply about are heavily into it and my poor hubby is wanting to obtain more privileges in the cong. Me, on the other hand, can't stand going to so many meetings and service and giving parts, etc.

Very much appreciate your ideas and support.

46